Did You Hear the One About...Ancient Sumerian Text Full of Crude Jokes

"Nibiru is returning, so we might as well laugh..."

A recently translated ancient text written in cuneiform is full of naughty humor, brain-teasing riddles and political parody!


The tablet, written approximately 3,500 years ago in the Akkadian language from Sumeria in ancient Mesopotamia, was discovered in present-day Iraq and is believed to have been written near the Persian Gulf close to the time of the biblical Exodus. The text includes a riddle about beer as well as political humor mocking governing officials. One riddle refers to the "deflowering" of an innocent maiden, with another joke hinting at an Oedipus Rex style mother/son relationship. (Ew!) Large parts of the text have remained undecipherable. The current location of the ancient clay tablet is not known, after it was pillaged from the museum where it had been housed during the initial stages of the Iraq War in 2003.

The Akkadian language and cuneiform texts were commonly used by the ancient Babylonians and other civilizations around the area of present-day Iraq and Iran. For a full translation of the "humorous" text, you may visit The Daily Mail.

All Dogs Go to Heaven: Heavenly Beam of Light Shrouds Dog of Fallen Soldier

Photo Credit: (Kimberly Launier/ABC News)

A reporter for the ABC news magazine 20/20 has captured a beautiful image of a beam of light surrounding the dog of a soldier killed in Iraq.

The story about soldier Justin Rollins and the dog Hero he helped to save from the streets of war-torn Iraq will certainly make the heart of even the most hardened individual soften. Justin had found the little puppy among a litter of eight living inside a derelict port-a-potty on the night before he was tragically killed in action. A fellow solider had taken a group of photographs of a beaming Justin, carefully holding the tiny puppies with great affection.

When the news of Justin's death reached his parents Rhonda and Skip and fiancée Brittney at home in New Hampshire, they were inconsolable. When Army officials attending Justin's funeral asked if there was anything they could do to assist the grieving family, Rhonda immediately asked if they could bring her one of the puppies Justin was photographed holding the night before he was killed.

The officials agreed in an offer to comfort the family, all the while realizing that it would more than likely be an impossible mission. When local news media in New Hampshire got wind of the story, it quickly became front page news, spurring on the effort to find one of the dogs and bring it to the States for a new, loving home. Eventually, one of the dirt-covered, hungry puppies was discovered and was brought home to a deeply moved Rhonda, Skip and Brittney. They immediately christened the dog Hero in honor of Justin.

On an overcast day in early fall, reporters, crew and photographers visited the Rollins' home in picturesque Newport, New Hampshire to do a human interest piece on Justin and his incredibly moving story. While photographer Kimberly Launier was taking pictures of the now fully-grown Hero, she saw a serenely beautiful beam of light enshrouding the courageous dog. She quickly photographed Hero bathed in the beautiful light, not knowing whether or not the heavenly halo would show up in her photographs. She quickly discovered that it had, almost as if the spirit of Justin was still alive and inhabiting the dog that now has a wonderful new life because of a brief encounter with a soldier who possessed a heart of true gold.

To read more about this amazing story, you may visit the following ABC links:

Hero the Dog
Bringing Hero the Dog Home