Monday, January 9, 2012

Got Crabs: Scientists Name New Crab Species After David Hasselhoff



Former Baywatch beach runner David Hasselhoff has a distinctive new honor to boast about: a newly discovered species of crabs have been named after him!

Forget having a street, school, hospital wing or bridge named in your honor, you've really made it when you have crabs...with your moniker. When scientists recently discovered a new species of Yeti crab, they noticed that the little buggers had an unusually hairy chest. This reminded some of the scientists of The Hoff, running bare-chested along the beach with all that famous chest hair blowing in the breeze. Hence, they dubbed the creepy clawed crawlies "The Hasselhoff".

The Hasselhoff crab reportedly lives approximately 2,500 meters below water, on the Southern Ocean floor of the Antarctic. In the following video, I definitely see the resemblance...

Better Ingredients, Better Pizza, Racial Slurs: New Yorker Tweets Receipt with Racist Message



A New York City woman is outraged after an employee at a Papa Johns Pizza carry-out restaurant wrote an offensive racial slur on her receipt after she picked up her order.

Minhee Cho thought everything was going great when she visited the Midtown Manhattan pizzeria to pick up her order. Her opinion of the visit quickly soured however after she examined her receipt for the order more carefully. One of the employee's had written the racial epithet "Lady Chinky Eyes" on the line indicating the customer's name. Minhee promptly posted a photograph of the receipt to her twitter feed and Facebook page, and the incident immediately went viral.

The Louisville, Kentucky, based restaurant chain quickly issued an apology to Cho, releasing an official statement regarding the incident: "We were extremely concerned to learn of the receipt issue in New York. This act goes against our company values, and we've confirmed with the franchisee that this matter was addressed immediately and that the employee is being terminated. We are truly sorry for this customer's experience."

The manager from the chain has since fired the employee who wrote the message on the receipt, an unidentified 16-year-old girl. Cho was initially surprised by the racial slur, stating, "“I was very surprised because the lady that was serving me was super nice and we joked and it seemed super normal."

Sunday, January 8, 2012

ZomBee Apocalypse: Fly Parasite Turns Bees into Zombies


Scientists in the United States have discovered that a fly parasite can turn honey bees into confused zombies before killing them, a discovery that might offer new clues as to why bee colonies are collapsing in disturbing numbers all around the world.

As of now, the fly parasite has only been detected in honey bees in areas of California and South Dakota, researchers reported in the science journal PLoS ONE this past week. However, if it turns out to be an emerging parasite, this "underlines the danger that could threaten honey bee colonies throughout North America," says the study published by San Francisco State University professor of biology John Hafernik.

The parasite nests in the stomach of the bees and causes them to walk in circles, sometimes pursuing bright lights, before eventually dying. Bees usually just sit in one place, sometimes curling up before they die.  But the infected bees were still alive, unable to stand up on their own legs. “They kept stretching them out and then falling over,” reports Andrew Core, a graduate student in Hafernik's lab.  “It really painted a picture of something like a zombie.” Once bees were infected by the fly parasite, they would then abandon their hives and congregate near lights, a highly unusual behavior for bees.


Scientists and bee experts have theorized that the huge die-off of bees worldwide that first came to light in 2006, a major threat to crops that depend on the honey-making insects for pollination, cannot be attributed to any one factor. Parasites, viral and bacterial infections, pesticides, as well as poor nutrition resulting from the impact of human activities on the environment have all played a role in the  troubling decline. The mysterious decimation of honey bee populations in the United States, Europe, Japan and elsewhere in the past decade threatens agricultural production worth tens of billions of dollars and the very future of the food chain for humanity.


Say Her Name, Say Her Name: Beyoncé Gives Birth to Daughter


Superstar singer Beyoncé has given birth to her first child with husband rapper Jay Z.

The "Halo" singer gave birth last night at the Lennox Hill hospital via C-Section in New York City, according to sources close to the couple. The baby girl's name has been revealed as Ivy Blue Carter by certain media outlets, but other sources, including good friend to the couple, actress Gwyneth Paltrow, have announced her name as Blue Ivy Carter.

Sources also claim that the name does have significance to both Beyoncé and Jay Z, with Blueprint being the name of Jay's popular album and Ivy is reference to Beyoncé's album 4 (IV being the Roman Numeral for the number).

We congratulate the shining couple and the birth of their new, Halo wearing angel.


Friday, January 6, 2012

7 Days Later: World Economy Could Withstand One Week Global Disaster



The global economy could withstand widespread disruption caused from a global natural disaster or nuclear attack for only one week as governments and businesses are not sufficiently prepared to deal with unexpected, catastrophic events, states a report by respected think tank, London-based Chatham House.

Events such as March's devastating earthquake and tsunami in Japan and the eruption of a volcano in Iceland last year have shown that key sectors and businesses can be severely affected if disruption to production or transport goes on for more than a week. The ash cloud from an Icelandic volcano halted air traffic over Europe for over a week, costing the European Union 5-10 billion euros and pushing several airlines and travel companies to the verge of bankruptcy.

After the Japanese earthquake, tsunami and nuclear crisis in March, global industrial production declined by 1.1 percent the following month, according to information provided by the World Bank. Similar drops in production have occurred in the past few months, due to catastrophic flooding currently plaguing Thailand. Costs can escalate quickly when transport or major production hubs are disrupted for more than a few days, which can in turn threaten food and water supplies and energy and communication networks, the report said. In the event of prolonged disruption, some businesses would be forced to cut investment and jobs or consider closing down, leading to a permanent reduction in countries' growth. 

Climate change and the scarcity of untainted water during a major catastrophe will only add to the risks to populations, which would put added strain on infrastructure and resources.

Them! Scientists Create Monstrous Mutant Ants


Scientists have unleashed terror against picnickers around the world... by creating monstrous "super-soldier" ants in laboratory experiments!

In a plot line directly out of a 1950s B sci-fi film, scientists say they can now create the super-soldiers at will by dabbing normal ant larvae with a specific hormone. The larvae then develop into the so-called super-soldiers rather than normal soldier or worker ants.

The super-soldier ants use their massive, over-sized heads and deadly pincers to block the entrance to their nest to protect the colony from being invaded by enemy ants from nearby colonies. The super-soldier ants occur naturally in the wild, but are actually extremely rare. 

Scientists proved that ordinary ants of the species Pheidole morrisi contain all the genetic codes needed to turn them into super-soldiers in the wild, but only under very specific conditions, which can now be re-created in the lab.

The research on the experiment has now been published in this month's edition of the Journal of Science.

Photo: The Daily Mail

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Baby Got Back: Woman Uses Her Backside to Vandalize $30 Million Painting

Little known fact: Spanish Surrealist Artist Salvador Dali was a major influence on Sir Mixalot


A Colorado woman must have been inspired by Sir Mixalot's 90s classic Hip Hop tune "Baby Got Back" after being arrested for rubbing her big ol' onion on a famous painting valued at over $30 million!

Police responded to a call from curators and security at the Clyfford Still Museum located in Denver. Witnesses alleged that Carmen Tisch, 36, scratched at, punched and then rubbed her ample backside against Still's abstract-expressionist masterpiece "1957-J no.2", causing at least $10,000 in damages. Police alleged that the woman was quite inebriated at the time of the incident. They also claim that Tisch tried to urinate on the painting...but her stream missed its target.

Tisch was charged with felony criminal mischief and has been held on a $20,000 bond since the incident took place in late December. Clyfford Still (1904-1980) was considered one of the most influential of the American post-World War II abstract expressionist artists, although he was not as well known as others such as Jackson Pollock. Four of his works were auctioned by Sotheby's last year for $114 million to endow the Denver museum, which opened in November.



Word! A List of Banned Words for 2012



Lake Superior University in Michigan has released its latest list of the most overused words for the past year. Each year, the university polls people as to what they believe to be the most irritatingly overused expressions for the past twelve months, words and expressions people believe should be banned from the vernacular over the course of the following year. 

Number One on their list? Amazing... (Hmmm...not "epic", "fail" or "winning"? Interesting!)

Coming in at Number Two was "baby bump".  As in "I'm tired of guessing how Beyonce's baby bump is going to look today". 

"Occupy" comes in at Number Four, as the Occupy Wall Street movement exploding across the US and the rest of the world, and was relentlessly pounded into our consciousness. 

Here's the complete list of the Top Twelve:
  1. Amazing
  2. Baby Bump
  3. Shared Sacrifice
  4. Occupy
  5. Blowback
  6. Man Cave
  7. The New Normal
  8. Pet Parent
  9. Win the Future
  10. Trickeration
  11. Ginormous
  12. Thank You in Advance





Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Picture of the Day: The [Tree] That [Saved] the Camel's Back

Photo Courtesy The Daily Mail

A lonely, over-heated dromedary seeking a respite from the overwhelming heat of the desert sun is today's Picture of the Day. 

 This over-heated camel sought refuge in the boiling heat on the island of Soqotra in Yemen by sheltering in the shade under a bizarre tree which looks like a gigantic mushroom. Using the tree as an over-sized parasol, the camel was able to rest and recuperate after trekking across the hot sand dunes on the tiny, desert island located in the Red Sea off the coast of Yemen. 


The tree is called the Dragon's Blood tree, named for the crimson sap that seeps from the bark. The sap has been used for centuries locally, both as a tint for paint as well as for medicinal reasons. The tree is extremely rare, only growing on the small, remote island. 







Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Murder The Queen Wrote: Woman Found Dead on Queen Elizabeth's Estate

"A most foul act has been committed..."

A woman has been found dead at Queen Elizabeth's sprawling country estate Sandringham, where the Royal Family spent New Year's Eve. The gruesome discovery was made less than three miles from the Queen's home located in Norfolk outside of London.


The female corpse was spotted by a member of the public out walking, just hours after the royals attended their traditional church service on New Year's Day. Police immediately sealed off the area and informed the Royal Family of the discovery. Yesterday the Queen, 85, was seen out riding one of her horses on the massive 20,500 acre estate near King's Lynn, Norfolk. The family, including newlyweds Prince William and his bride Kate Middleton, spent Christmas at Sandringham as well. The Queen's husband, Prince Phillip, 90, was rushed to the hospital on Christmas Eve after experiencing severe chest pains.

No details about how long the body had been left in the elements, the age of the victim or the cause of death have been released to the public. An autopsy on the body was scheduled to be done on Tuesday to determine an exact cause of death.

 It's not the first time that a dead body has been discovered on or near property belonging to the Queen. In March 2010, the body of American Robert James Moore, described as a loner who was obsessed with the Queen, was found 100 yards from Buckingham Palace.

For Ditzy Doppelganger & Wilhemina Wolfhauser



Hey Ditzy & Wilhemina...I promised to post a video of those Filipino prison dancers! Hope you guys can choreograph one of these routines by tomorrow!




Your dance moves better be sublime, ladies...

Return of the Birds: New Jersey Town Invaded by Seagulls

A town in New Jersey is living through a real-life version of Alfred Hitchcock's classic horror film The Birds. 

Thousands of squawking seagulls have invaded a townhouse complex in Tinton Falls, New Jersey. The flying menaces have become such a nuisance, that parents are having their children walk outdoors beneath umbrellas as to avoid being splattered by falling cascades of bird droppings.

Township Mayor Michael Skudera believes than an experiment using falcons at a nearby landfill might have frightened the seagulls to move less than a quarter of a mile away and start roosting in a housing complex located within the township. The county has suspended the falcon program within the past week, but any difference in the bird plague has been negligible.


Rooftops in the Fox Chase housing development are splotched white from tons of bird doo, small animal bones litter backyard patios, feathers are everywhere and children who use the equipment in the playground end up with nasty, white residue on their clothes.

If Melanie Griffith's mother Tippi Hendren moves into the neighborhood, I'd be making a fast break out of town...



 

Monday, January 2, 2012

Can You Break a Million? Man Tries to Use Million Dollar Bill at Wal-Mart


A Lexington, North Carolina, man was arrested after trying to pass off a one million dollar bill at his local Wal-Mart.

Police say 53-year-old Michael Anthony Fuller was shopping at the store and had selected a number of items for purchase, including a vacuum cleaner, a microwave oven and other merchandise, that added up to a grand total of $476. The man proceeded to take a bill out of his wallet marked One Million Dollars and attempted to use the felonious bill to pay for his purchases.

Store staff promptly called the police (but I am surprised that some clueless Sprawl-Mart employee didn't try to get change for the bill!) Fuller was later charged with attempting to obtain property by false pretense and Uttering a Forged Instrument (click link for definition), both felonies, court records show.

The largest dollar bill currently in circulation in the US is the $100 bill. In 1969, Federal officials discontinued the use of $500, $1,000, $5,000 and $10,000 bills because of lack of public use.

For the record, the largest denomination of the American dollar ever printed was the $100,000 bill. The bills featured a portrait of President Woodrow Wilson and were only used between the years 1933-1935.


Marry (The Mayor): Lady GaGa Rings in 2012 Smooching NYC Mayor Bloomberg

"Yes, folks, this kiss IS a sign of the approaching Apocalypse..."

Lady GaGa rang in the year 2012 by putting a big wet one on the lips of New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg. (Yet another sign the Mayan End-time calendar for this year is correct!)

GaGa rocked out on Dick Clark's Rockin' New Years' Eve by performing a medley of her top hits over the past year, including "Born This Way" and "Marry the Night". The 25-year-old superstar also was given the unique honor of being the one to release the 12,000-pound Waterford crystal ball during the countdown to the Magic Hour. Dressed appropriately in a beaded crystal gown from Versace complete with one of her trademark masks and requisite long gloves, she looked as sparkling as Times Square itself, as she elected to plant a midnight smooch on 69-year-old billionaire Bloomberg. (Instead of her hunky, rumored boyfriend Taylor Kinney?) The unlikely duo even shared a cute, midnight dance.

GaGa certainly has reason to celebrate, as she was once again the top earning artist for the past year. Forbes magazine listed the avant-garde entertainer as the top earning artist of 2011, with earnings surpassing $100 million over the past twelve months.


Sunday, January 1, 2012

Bye, Bye Blackbird: Birds Fall Dead from the Sky for Second New Year's Eve in a Row



It must have felt like a bizarre case of deja vu for police officers and emergency service crews in Beebe, Arkansas, last night as they were called out to clean up literally thousands of dead blackbirds, for the second New Year's Eve in as many years.

The small, rural community saw thousands of blackbirds fall from the sky dead last night, a frightening repeat of a similar event that took place on the same evening last year. Officials were quick to blame celebratory New Year's fireworks being shot off or a sudden, intense hail storm as the cause of last year's deaths, but a ban on fireworks and clear weather exclude those theories from being the cause of the bizarre incident this year.

Last year, hundreds of similar incidences of birds and other animals such as mollusks, fish, whales and dolphins, began to die en masse all around the world during the first few weeks of 2011. No official explanation has ever been offered as to the direct cause of such a diverse series of events taking place simultaneously around the world.



Same Day, Different Sh*t: Economists Design Never-Changing Calendar Year


As you hang up that new Beefcake Men of the Australian Outback or Adorable Kittens Doing Adorable Things calendar you received as a Christmas present on this first day of the year 2012, mathematicians and economists from John Hopkins University in Baltimore, Maryland, have devised a new calendar for the world: one that always remains the same!

The economists claim that having a standard year without a leap day added would save the global economy billions of dollars each year, due to the predictability of when a date falls, such as Christmas, New Year, as well as personal dates such as anniversaries and birthdays.

Under the new Hanke-Henry Permanent Calendar, if Christmas fell on a Sunday in 2011 it would also fall on a Sunday in 2012 and every year after. This would be a big change from the current Gregorian calendar the world uses, which adds an extra day to the calendar month of February every four years. (2012 will be a Leap Year, by the way).  The Gregorian calendar was first introduced by Pope Gregory XIII and has been in use since the year 1582, replacing the earlier Julian calendar.


Using the Hanke-Henry permanent calendar, each year would be only 364 days long, with a week-long "mini"-month being added to the calendar every five years to keep in tune with the solar cycle. This would give workers an extra-work week...and an extra week of pay every five years. 
It sounds like a good plan, but I'm sure those calendar designers won't be very pleased...




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