Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Twitter Madness: UK Couple Denied Entry into the US after Making Jokes on Twitter

Advanced warning for anyone with a Twitter account about to visit the US: Don't make any jokes about what you plan on doing during your trip to your Twitter feed...

Case in point: Two UK residents were denied entry into the United States after the Department of Homeland Security intercepted tweets from the two which they believed were a "threat" to the nation. Leigh Van Bryan, 26, was first questioned about a tweet he wrote that read, "Free this week, for quick gossip/prep before I go and destroy America." He explained to officials that "destroy" is Brit slang for partying and getting drunk, but they obviously weren't buying the reasonable explanation.

His companion,  24-year-old Emily Bunting, was also questioned about her intentions after she had tweeted, "3 weeks today, we're totally in LA pissing people off on Hollywood Blvd and diggin' Marilyn Monroe up!", which was a reference to a joke from popular Fox cartoon Family Guy. Customs agents at the Los Angeles Airport searched the duo's luggage for shovels, firmly believing the couple were on a mission to disinter the body of the Some Like It Hot actress from her crypt at the Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery in West LA.

The two were handcuffed and interrogated for over five hours, then placed in a cell where they were watched by armed guards for 12 more hours. Their passports were ultimately confiscated and they were sent back home to Great Britain, without a refund for all the money they had spent planning what should have been a dream holiday to the States that promptly turned into a senseless nightmare.

The Department of Homeland Security has taken a greater interest in Twitter and other social networking sites in light of the importance they have played in uprisings and revolutions that have sprung up all around the world over the past year. So, be very careful what you joke about online, as Big Brother is definitely watching you, and if he doesn't like what you have to say, you could find yourself in some real trouble...

Monday, January 30, 2012

Boobarella: Rome Fashion Show Reveals Boob Job Haute Couture

"It takes a lot of magic 'shrooms to come up with something like this..."

Obviously inspired by avant-garde pop superstar Lady GaGa, Italian fashion designer Gianni Molaro revealed his trippy new haute couture line during Alta Roma fashion week in Rome.

The pièce de résistance of the runway show was Molaro's Boobarella Cyclops gown, complete with alien-like appendages and a GaGa-esque face mask. Molaro must be angling to design for the chameleon-like singer, who continually changes her image to shock her audience.

Another model did her little turn on the catwalk sashaying in a dress made out of open umbrellas, while another model inexplicably had a giant bicycle wheel attached to her head. The designer also managed to sneak in some political references regarding the current economic situation into one of his gowns, as the Italian people endure tough austerity measures brought on by the Euro crisis.

The music for the Fellini inspired fashion show was provided by a violin player dressed in one of the designer's gowns, suspended from a trolley guided by some handsome, well-dressed bellhops.

For more photographs of the intriguing creations, you may visit The Daily Mail.

Save Ferris: Matthew Broderick Returns as Ferris Beuller in New Honda Ad

"Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?"

Matthew Broderick returns to his iconic role as sly slacker Ferris Bueller in new television ads for Honda cars that will debut during next week's Super Bowl.

Don't want to wait to watch the commercial? No worries, you can check out all the fun online! Broderick actually portrays himself in the ads, calling up his bosses at the movie studio, pretending to be sick in order to play hooky from work. There's even that song  "Oh, Yeah!" by Yello that played at the end of the John Hughes' classic Ferris Bueller's Day Off during the extended credits, with Principal Rooney on the bus! Matthew spends his "free day" from filming his latest movie driving around in his Honda CR-V , wasting time at a beachfront amusement park and hanging out at the Natural History Museum, re-connecting with nature. He does encounter a bit of trouble when his boss drives up beside him on the road, but an enormous panda bear won at the amusement park saves the day. He even gets up and sings (unfortunately, not to the Beatle's "Twist & Shout") at a parade in Chinatown.

Of course, he does make a return at the end of the commercial, asking why the audience is still here, watching. It's been 26 years, and we'll wait another 26 to see you again, Ferris. See you at the Super Bowl...

That Explains the Laugh: Nanny Star Fran Drescher Claims She Was Abducted by Aliens

Former The Nanny star, actress Fran Drescher, may have finally explained where her trademark braying laugh originated...she claims she was once abducted by aliens!

The actress, currently starring in Happily Divorced on cable network TV Land, told the incredible story in an interview for The Huffington Post, stating that her former husband, television exec Peter Marc Jacobson, was also abducted by aliens before the pair met. "Peter and I both saw [aliens] before we knew each other, doing the same thing, driving on the road with our dads," Drescher said. "We were both in junior high. A few years later, we met, and we realized that we had the same experience. I think that somehow we were programmed to meet. We both have this scar. It's the exact same scar on the exact same spot."

She insists that the aliens implanted a micro-chip in her hand, presumably to track her whereabouts throughout the cosmos. Her ex Jacobson, however, claims Drescher's scar was caused by accidentally pouring scalding water on herself, but the actress insists "That's what the aliens programmed us to think," she said. "But really, that's where the chip is."

Drescher wrote about her recent bout with uterine cancer in her bestselling memoir Cancer Schmancer. Will we see an Anne Heche style second autobiography (Call Me Crazy)  in the future from Drescher?

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Shirt Off His Back: Novak Djokovic Tosses Shirt to Girl in Audience, Crazed Woman Snatches It Away

Courtesy: Getty Images

Tennis superstar Novak Djokovic has a penchant for ripping off his shirt whenever he wins a match, and then usually he picks out a young female fan in the audience to receive the sweaty garment.

Today was no exception, as Djokovic battled Spanish tennis ace Rafael Nadal in a grueling five-hour-plus match for the Grand Slam title at the Australian Open in Melbourne. The incredible match lasted for five hours and 53 minutes, shattering the record for the longest Grand Slam final in history. It was also the longest continuous match in major history and the third-longest overall.

Djokovic came out on top, besting Rafa in one of the greatest matches witnessed in recent memory. Novak wasted no time ripping off his shirt in his by now commonplace celebratory gesture. After letting off some steam and enjoying his moment of victory, he picked out a young fan to toss his shirt to seated in the grand stand. Another crazed grown-up had other plans, quickly snatching the shirt from the hands of the shocked girl, who clearly Novak had intended to have his shirt. Who knew tennis groupies could be so intense?

Take a Chance on Us: Swedish Supergroup ABBA to Release 1st New Song in 18 Years

ABBA decked out in their 70s Forever Lazies...

Swedish pop group ABBA will be releasing their first new song in over 18 years. The group, who scored hit after hit in the 1970s and early 80s, disbanded in 1982. ABBA sold over one hundred million records worldwide and scored an impressive list of Number One hits across a large portion of the world.

Group members Agnetha Fältskog, Benny Andersson, Björn Ulvaeus and Anni-Frid Lyngstad toured the world together as one of entertainment's most popular acts, before the price of fame ultimately tore the good friends (and former couples) apart. 

The "new" song is actually an unreleased single left off the group's final album, 1981's The Visitors, titled "From a Twinkling Star to a Passing Angel". The group have never performed live together since disbanding in 1982, not even reuniting to perform for their induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2010. The group experienced a rebirth in popularity over the past several decades, courtesy of the Australian cult film Muriel's Wedding starring Toni Collette as well as the popular Broadway hit play Mamma Mia, featuring the band's catchy pop tunes. 

It's a Wonderful Life: Small Town Rallies Behind Mom & Pop Store

The owner of a Mom & Pop hardware store in a small community in northern Ohio had a true It's a Wonderful Life moment when hordes of local townspeople rushed to the store to spend their hard-earned money...and to save the store from possible closure.

Jack Shutts, the owner of the Chagrin Hardware Store in Chagrin, Ohio, outside of Cleveland didn't anticipate the reaction his customers would have to an e-mail call for a "cash mob" to help his store out. "Let's show our support for one of our local businesses. I challenge everyone to spend AT LEAST $20 at the hardware on the 21st," Shutts' good friend Jim Black wrote in a letter to all of his e-mail and Facebook friends. 

Although he did casually mention a "cash mob" in the e-mail, Jim had no political motivations whatsoever... he just wanted an easy and affordable way to promote his friend's store, as the tight noose of the much larger "box super-stores" such as Lowes' and Home Depot tightens around the necks of small business owners. 

Word quickly spread through the picturesque town that Jack and the hardware store were in need of help. By 10 AM, the store was crowded with people, both longtime customers and new customers alike.  By early afternoon, the credit card machine in the store had gone temporarily offline, after repeated use. Chances are, the store has never seen so many customers in a 24 hour period of time.

The Chagrin Hardware Store has been a staple of the community since the original store opened in 1857. The Shutts family has owned and operated the store for the past 72 years. "Thanks to Jimmy Black,' an emotional Shutts said at the end of the incredible day. "Thanks to everyone. Thanks to Chagrin Falls. What a place to live."

It's very encouraging to know that a town like the fictional Bedford Falls in Frank Capra's classic It's a Wonderful Life still actually exists in modern day USA...

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Socks from Heaven: South Korea Sends Warm Socks to the North via Balloons

An activist group in South Korea has sent over one thousand pairs of warm, wooly socks to the long-suffering citizens of North Korea...attached to enormous balloons.

Crates of the socks were sent high up into the heavens attached to five balloons while the breeze was blowing in the right direction toward the North Korean border from the South Korean city of Paju. The Seoul-based activist group called North Korea Peace also attached "innocuous non-political" messages with the socks. "We're not interested in sending political messages or sparking any troubles there. All we want is that people in the North wear warm socks over their frozen feet," states North Korea Peace spokesperson Sunny Kim.

Socks are apparently so hard to come by in North Korea, that they are often traded for cash. One pair of warm socks can be traded for 22 lbs. of corn, which can sustain an individual for approximately one month. Information sneaking out of the communist nation tells of a nightmarish existence for the North Koreans, including millions of deaths each year from starvation, disease, and exposure.

Relations with the two countries continue to be strained, even in the light of former North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il's death last month of a heart attack at the age of 69. Power has since been transferred to Il's son, Kim Jong Un.

Did You Hear the One About...Ancient Sumerian Text Full of Crude Jokes

"Nibiru is returning, so we might as well laugh..."
A recently translated ancient text written in cuneiform is full of naughty humor, brain-teasing riddles and political parody!

The tablet, written approximately 3,500 years ago in the Akkadian language from Sumeria in ancient Mesopotamia, was discovered in present-day Iraq and is believed to have been written near the Persian Gulf close to the time of the biblical Exodus. The text includes a riddle about beer as well as political humor mocking governing officials. One riddle refers to the "deflowering" of an innocent maiden, with another joke hinting at an Oedipus Rex style mother/son relationship. (Ew!) Large parts of the text have remained undecipherable. The current location of the ancient clay tablet is not known, after it was pillaged from the museum where it had been housed during the initial stages of the Iraq War in 2003.

The Akkadian language and cuneiform texts were commonly used by the ancient Babylonians and other civilizations around the area of present-day Iraq and Iran. For a full translation of the "humorous" text, you may visit The Daily Mail.

Stuff Grandma in the Storage Unit: Dead Woman Kept in Storage Locker for 17 Years

A Clearwater, Florida, storage facility manager received quite a surprise when he discovered that one of his storage units had been used as a burial crypt...for more than 17 years!

Kevin McKeon of U-Stor Self Storage found out about the body after the renter fell behind on her payments for the unit. When he contacted the renter to inform her that the contents of the unit would be sold if she was unable to come up with the money, she told him he couldn't sell all the objects, as one of them was a coffin containing the remains of her long-departed grandma!

Initially, McKeon did not believe her story, feeling it was just a ruse to buy more time to come up with the money for the payment, so he didn't check on the unit until several days later, on Thursday. When he opened the door, he quickly discovered the renter was actually telling the truth, when he saw the long blue casket stored inside. He immediately contacted local authorities.

Police and investigators have since located the death certificate for the woman, who died in 1995 at the age of 94. The body was properly prepared for burial, authorities report. As of now, no charges have been filed against the renter of the storage unit.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Twitter Me This: Social Network Site Agrees to Restrict Topics in Certain Countries

Social network micro-blogging site Twitter has announced that it plans to honor countries' wishes and restrict certain content and topics from being viewed or discussed by members located in those countries.

The move is seen as a dangerous push forward in the attempt to completely control the Internet, the last remaining free media for the world. Officials for the site announced that they will voluntarily restrict Twitter content in specific countries to comply with government limits on what citizens are allowed to read and discuss in an open forum.

"Starting today, we give ourselves the ability to reactively withhold content from users in a specific country while keeping it available in the rest of the world," the company announced on its official blog site. The change in policy is seen as shocking, especially in view of the importance Twitter played in last year's Egyptian uprising against former president Hosni Mubarak.

Millions of Egyptians used the site to co-ordinate protests, helping to gather enormous crowds of people together in a short amount of time. The Egyptian government quickly put plans into place to shut down the Internet to the Egyptian people, but the idea of revolution had already quickly spread. Other nations in the Middle East were quick to tighten the reigns over the Internet, in a preemptive strike against the forming revolutions in their own countries.

The Twitter blog only specifically mentioned French and German rules outlawing Nazi communications among members, and added that the new restrictive policy has yet to be put into place. The blog stated that some countries' restrictions are so severe that "we will not be able to exist there," meaning potentially millions of users will suddenly find their twitter feeds falling silent. The news is very sobering, in light of the US Congress consideration of the Stop Online Piracy Act, which many condemned as an obvious attempt to take control over the Internet within the United States.

Goodbye, Kotter: Sitcom Star Robert Hegyes Dies of Heart Attack, Age 60

Actor Robert Hegyes, who starred opposite a young John Travolta on the classic hit 70s sitcom Welcome Back, Kotter, has died of cardiac arrest at the age of sixty.

Hegyes  appeared as wise-cracking half Jewish/half Puerto Rican character Juan Epstein on the series for four seasons, from 1975 through 1979. The show focused on a group of remedial high school students known as the Sweathogs at the fictitious James Buchanan High in Brooklyn, New York, head by compassionate and understanding teacher Gabe Kotter, played by Gabe Kaplan.

The series scored an Emmy nomination as Outstanding Comedy Series in 1976. Hegyes would go on to direct several episodes of the television series. He was seen at last year's series reunion for the TV Land Awards, where he appeared onstage beside Travolta and former co-stars Marcia Strassman and Gabe Kaplan. The actor had been in failing health after suffering a heart attack several years ago, his brother Mark told the press. He leaves behind his two children, Cassie and Mack, and two step-children, Sophia and Alex.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Throw Out the Old Spice: New Alibi Men's Cologne Rids Strip Club Scent

"I bet pirates never had this problem..."

Men who enjoy their creeping but hate being caught by their overly-suspicious wives/girlfriends when coming home smelling like a strip club after a night of drunken debauchery with "the guys" have a sweet new alternative...

It seems Maverick's strip club in Capetown, South Africa, has invented a clever way for straying boyfriends/husbands to sneak out to the club behind their significant other's back and get away with it. The club offers a range of "alibis" for men to chose from, including an "Honestly, Babe...My Car Broke Down" eau de parfum that smells like fuel, oil and burnt rubber to cover the scent of patchouli and baby oil (and the lovely odor of stale cigarette smoke) from the strip club!

Yeah, we're sure that the cologne will convince her he didn't do anything bad, if it wasn't for all the body glitter and lipstick he picked up from his lap dance, especially when he stumbles through the door at four o'clock in the morning! Busted!

Special Recipe: Social Network Actor Armie Hammer Arrested for Marijuana-Laced Cookies

Not your grandmother's recipe... unless she grew up in the 60s or 70s...

It seems Social Network actor Armie Hammer likes to chomp down on some special cookies whenever he gets the munchies after it was revealed he was arrested last year for possession of marijuana-laced cookies on the Mexican/US border.

Apparently, drug sniffing dogs zeroed in on the baggie full of delicious treats at the border crossing and check-point in Sierra Blanca, Texas. Hammer isn't the only celebrity to have trouble at the border crossing: both rapper Snoop Dog and country legend Willie Nelson have experienced trouble passing through customs and immigration at the same location.

The actor, who also recently co-starred with Leonardo diCaprio in the bio-pic J. Edgar, spent a night in jail after he was arrested for being in possession of 0.02 ounces of marijuana, three medicinal marijuana cookies and one brownie. The El Paso, Texas, district attorney decided not to prosecute the case because a felony charge requires a person be in possession of more than four ounces of marijuana. 

The handsome 25-year-old will next be seen starring opposite Julia Roberts in the upcoming comedy Mirror, Mirror (although a role as Shaggy in another Scooby-Doo movie is not out of the question...) 

"A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, and a big ol' bowl.."

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

There Once Was a Boat from Nantucket [That Ended Up in Spain]

A boat that was lost after being hit by a rogue wave off the coast of Nantucket Island, Massachusetts has been found completely intact...some three years later.

The owner of the boat The Queen Bee and a passenger were tossed into the sea by the rogue wave and watched helplessly as the boat disappeared into the deadly surf.  Both men  survived being tossed into the ocean after the ship's inflatable life raft miraculously appeared in the water beside them. Although owner Scott Douglas was grateful to be alive after the ordeal, he was certain that it would be the last time he would ever see his beloved boat.

Fast forward three years later and The Queen Bee has been resurrected after the boat came ashore, some three thousand miles across the Atlantic Ocean from where it was lost, in Llanes, Spain. It's not uncommon for the US Coast Guard to locate derelict ships from Florida off the coast of Virginia, or vessels from Virginia off the coast of Massachusetts, but one has never been discovered fully intact in Europe. Based on international salvage laws, the boat now belongs to Spain.

Douglas misses his boat, but doesn't expect to get it back. He plans on telling the story of The Queen Bee as a children's book.

And the 1st Angel Sounded the Trumpet: Bizarre Sounds Heard Around the World

Reports of loud, strange noises being heard continue from all around the globe. Reports of the unusually loud, metallic sound have pored in from such disparate locations as Alberta, Canada, Poland, Costa Rica, Mexico and the UK, as well as various locations throughout the United States. The reports have particularly grown over the past week. Local media where the sounds are occurring is covering the events, but it has yet to catch on with the national media. The latest report of the loud, bizarre noise comes out of Saskatoon, Canada from just the past twelve hours.

First reports of the odd, trumpet-like sound came out of the Ukraine last summer. Earlier last winter, a strange, loud roar accompanied by shaking ground was observed in Florida, which was never fully explained:

Speculation as to what is causing the odd noise has exploded across the Internet, with people guessing that it is anything from aliens trying to make First Contact with humans, to the Large Hadron Collider (CERN)  in Switzerland creating a tear in our earthly dimension. Others believe the sound to be tectonic plates grinding from beneath the planet, with others guessing it is underground construction of bunkers to store people, food and supplies in the event of a cataclysm.

Fight Club 911: Man Calls Emergency Services to Arrange Fight with Police

Police in Willowbrook, Illinois, were surprised when a local man called emergency line 911 to try and arrange a fight with officers.

The man, 38-year-old John R. Pacella, made the emergency call at 4 AM saying he "wanted to see an officer because he wanted to fight with them" . When the police arrived at his residence, he was already in Fight Club mode and immediately started to shove and punch at the officers. He was promptly arrested and hauled off the jail. (Not exactly a surprise, after all, he did break the Fight Club cardinal rule: Do Not Talk About Fight Club!!!)

Pacella was booked at DuPage County Jail with his bail set at $100,000. He remains behind bars on charges of aggravated battery, resisting a police officer, and battery with intent to provoke or insult. Pacella is no stranger to the police and has a past with local authorities, and is a registered sex offender in the state of Illinois.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

The Angry Sun: Solar Storm Batters Earth

Earth is currently being bombarded by super-charged particles from the worst solar storm in years, scientists warn. The particles are a concern as they can cause disruption to satellites and major communication networks and are a threat to astronauts on the International Space Station. Disruptions in cell phone, Internet and cable television service can be expected.

The geomagnetic storm has been caused by a large M-Class flare that erupted from the sun on Monday. The effects are likely to be felt on Earth throughout Wednesday, experts say. SpaceWeather.com is reporting that people in more northern latitudes will be able to witness vivid Northern Light displays.

Aircraft travel is also being adversely affected by the solar storm. Delta Airlines has announced that it plans to reroute planes that fly close to the North Pole as a precautionary measure, to avoid exposing airline passengers and crew to high levels of solar radiation.

In 1972, a geomagnetic storm provoked by a solar flare knocked out long-distance telephone communication across the US state of Illinois. In 1989, another storm plunged six million people into darkness across the Canadian province of Quebec.

Saving All My [Money] For You: Reports Say Whitney Houston Flat Broke


Superstar Singer Whitney Houston may be getting So Emotional if rumors about her current financial situation are true...

An anonymous "friend" of the chanteuse is claiming that she has allegedly run through her estimated $100 million fortune and is now "broke as a joke". The source also claims that she is in such a dire financial situation that she has resorted to calling friends and family, begging to borrow $100 in cash at a time.

Houston, who once starred in the blockbuster movie The Bodyguard with Kevin Costner, is currently filming her comeback film Sparkle, in which she co-stars as American Idol winner Jordin Sparks' mother. The singer, who was one of the most successful recording acts of the 80s and 90s, signed one of the biggest record deals in history in 2001, valued at over $100 million for six albums. Unfortunately, the contract has only produced three new albums, including her flop 2009 release I Look to You.

Houston had to pay ex-husband, troubled ex-con (and New Edition member) Bobby Brown, millions of dollars in a costly divorce. She has also continually battled drug addiction over the years, checking herself in and out of rehab on several occasions, in spite of her claims to Oprah that she has never done drugs. Shocking photographs of her teenage daughter Bobbi Kristina allegedly snorting cocaine made the tabloids last year.

A spokesperson for Houston calls the claims about her financial situation "totally false and ridiculous". 

Never Forget: Elephants Say Touching Goodbye to Dead Infant

Zoo keepers at Munich, Germany's Hellabrun Zoo had the somber task of arranging an elephant memorial service after one of the zoo's baby elephants passed away from a congenital heart condition.

The three-month old calf Lola was scheduled for emergency surgery to repair a heart defect, but sadly she passed away before the operation could be performed. The workers at the park decided to hold a memorial for Lola to allow her mother Panang and the other elephants in the zoo to say their goodbyes.

As Lola lay upon the ground, the massive elephants took turns approaching her body, gently touching and nuzzling Lola with their trunks, seemingly in an effort to revive her lifeless body. Similar behaviors involving large elephant herds "mourning" the death of a member have been observed in the wild.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Baa Baa Pink Sheep: New Zealand Nature Park Dyes Sheep Rosy New Shade

"Do ewe like this shade of pink?"

The lyrics to the classic children's nursery rhyme "Baa Baa Black Sheep" will have to be changed while visiting the Sheepworld Nature Park in Auckland, New Zealand, after animal tenders dyed the sheep's wool a bright shade of pink!

Park employees originally dyed the animals as part of breast cancer awareness week, but it proved to be such a hit with visitors that they decided to keep the wooly mammals pink. If you are concerned that the other sheep will be making fun or bullying the smaller, weaker sheep because of being dyed the flaming color, you needn't worry. Experts say that sheep are practically one hundred percent color blind, so there won't be any ostracized lambs standing alone on a New Zealand hill, being left out of all the sheep games. 

The park also assures everyone that they use only organic colorings in the dye and no harm comes to the sheep during the dying process.

Godzilla Vs. The World: Classic Original Film Released in Restored Version

The original classic Godzilla film is getting a spectacular new release, with a digitally restored version on DVD and Blu Ray from the highbrow Criterion Collection. The company plans to release the full version of the original 1954 Japanese production, titled Gojira as well as the 1956 American edition of the movie, Godzilla: King of Monsters, which starred Perry Mason actor Raymond Burr.

Unlike the 27 subsequent sequels and remakes, the original film was a stark and disturbing parable about the dangers of atomic and nuclear powers. The film's darkness came directly from the Japanese experience, which had endured the dropping of atomic weapons on two of its cities, Hiroshima and Nagasaki, during the final moments of World War II. The film was seen as a way of purging the fear and heartbreak the Japanese people suffered from the atomic nightmare.

Disturbing scenes cut from the original Japanese version have been restored and added to the new version, including one of a terrified mother as she huddles in an alleyway, clutching her small child in the shadow of the fire-breathing creature. In another deleted scene, a fleeing woman sobs, "I barely survived the bombing of Nagasaki. And now this!" Both scenes were thought to be too intense for American viewers during the Cold War years of the 1950s.

The fact that the film's iconic creature would go on to play the hero in countless follow-ups is a testament to the impact the film has made on not only the Japanese people, but the entire world. The film remains even more relevant today, in light of Japan's recent nuclear meltdown at the stricken Fukushima nuclear facility, after March's devastating earthquake and tsunami.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

The Missing: Webbot's Data Gap of Missing Information from March 2012 thru May 2013

 Update October 11, 2013:
With the current US government shutdown in the news, I felt it was very important to update this blog post regarding the Web Bot Project. For almost a decade, the project has predicted the current economic meltdown taking place, not just in the United States, but around the world.  The "Death of the Dollar" meme has been in the linguistic forecast since at least 2004, possibly before then. The software picked out very specific phrasing regarding the events that would precede the collapse of the US dollar. The project foresaw the government shutdown as a facilitating event that would bring about the collapse of the US financial system, which would have a cascading effect that would create a financial tsunami and would travel the globe.

The project foresees a breakdown throughout American society, as citizens begin to understand just how dire the situation is. Once everyone understands that there is NO MONEY left in the coffers, social unrest and violence would quickly begin to spread across the country. If a default on US debt takes place, hyper-inflation would set in immediately, causing most life staples such as food and energy to quadruple (or more) in price. Most of the wording and phrases currently being bandied about by the biased media can be taken directly from many of the ALTA Reports that have been released over the past decade. A truly sobering thought...

Latest update March 23, 2013: Is last night's meteor event witnessed over entire US Eastern Seaboard confirmation of what the Webbots have predicted? More information here:

The Web Bot project, the predictive software that has successfully managed to peer into the future to foresee major world events, has reached a shocking plateau in its stream of research data.

The project, which analyzes changes in linguistic patterns on the Internet and makes predictions on future events based on the emerging patterns, has seen a puzzling drop-off of data stream information beginning in March of 2012 and lasting through May of 2013. The flat-lining data gap was picked up initially years ago and as time has progressed, the gap has become even more pronounced and disturbing.

For all intents and purposes, it appears that the human race goes completely quiet for an extended period of fourteen months, with virtually no new information being released. Speculation is rife across the Internet about what could possibly create the intense loss of information, with a global thermonuclear war, comet strike upon the earth, or massive solar flare from the sun disrupting mass communications and collapsing the energy grid being the most popular guesses. Other guesses include a super-volcanic eruption (blotting out the sun and plunging earth into an Ice Age), a pole shift, whereas the magnetic poles of the Earth suddenly change locations, creating devastating earthquakes and tsunamis worldwide, as well as a highly contagious pandemic disease decimating the human population. Also discussed heavily is the possibility of government agents shutting down the Internet (SOPA, PIPA) to quell dissent and panic while enacting Martial Law on the population. Another theory has a magnetic/solar related event making everyone's brain activity go haywire, turning a majority of humanity into drooling, uncommunicative zombies [Zombie Apocalypse warning from the Center for Disease Control]. 

The data gap from the Webbot Project is eerily similar to information from military grade remote viewers, who allegedly use psychic powers to see into the future. Starting in the 1950s, the now declassified Montauk Project began to notice a strange anomaly with remote viewers trying to see into the future. The viewers began to continually report "hitting a brick wall" around the year 2012, for which they were unable to see past. [Urgent Edit: The very latest information about what remote viewers are seeing regarding events in 2013-2014 may be found by reading my most recent blog post "Remote Viewers Are Seeing Catastrophic Event for Humanity's Near Future".]

[Edit: Of course, I didn't even mention the end time date of the much-maligned Mayan calendar. Curious how the entire planet starts to unravel like a gigantic spool of yarn as the December 21 date rapidly approaches. Is the world going to "end" on that date? Not likely. Nothing is going to happen that isn't already happening this very moment with the immense changes in climate, the stability of earth's geology as well as the continued degradation of the socioeconomic and political fabric of the planet.

The December 21 "end date" was a Time Stamp, intended to convey an important message well into the future, from a people who had a far deeper understanding of the universe than we do today, with all of our modern technology. The end date coincides with the Earth aligning with the galactic center of our universe, which obviously had considerably merit to the Mayans. The warning was issued because the Mayans were brilliant mathematicians and possessed a deep knowledge of the Cosmos. They knew that a disturbing and cataclysmic cycle of life would return, as it always has and always will. The message was for those living in the future to understand the dramatic changes they would have to endure during this period of time. Humanity has survived this cycle on several different occasions, as our existence is proof of this. Stories of humanity's fight for survival in the past have become "myths" and "legends", stories that we all recognize to this very day. Why? Because they are important. Will we survive it this time around? No one can answer that question.]

Whether or not the Webbot Project is picking up the same data gap that remote viewers have been noticing for literally decades remains to be seen. The Webbot Project first rose to prominence in June of 2001, when project members announced that a "major, life-altering event" would take place within a three month time frame. The events of September 11, 2001, were without a doubt one of the most life-altering events in global history. The project has also successfully predicted the Southeast Asia Boxing Day tsunami, the Space Shuttle Columbia disaster [Western state "maritime" disaster], the Wall Street collapse of 2008, the eruption of a volcano in Iceland suspending air travel and last year's earthquake/tsunami/nuclear meltdown in Japan [nuclear ill winds traveling the globe].

Did the Webbots predict Russian meteor explosion?

 Urgent Edit: [Addendum: This does meet the fulfillment language in the Webbot Project's (Web Bot Project) "New Land Rising" linguistic meme and temporal marker for the onset of major global events.]

New Island Emerges in North Sea 

 Possible new Webbot "Hit" with the "New Land Rising" meme (as well as the long term data trend of "Global Coastal Event") after a massive area of volcanic rocks from a submarine volcano the size of Belgium was discovered off the coast of New Zealand this week (August 9, 2012):

New Zealand "Volcanic Rock Island" a "New Land Rising" Webbot Hit? 

January 13, 2013: New Island Emerges in North Sea off Coast of Germany: Webbot Hit?

For more information about the Webbot Project, you may visit their blog: 
Webbot Project: Beware Not for the Faint of Heart or Those Under 18

 Fits in line with several Nostradamus prophecies as well as those of Mother Shipton:
Newly-Discovered "Great" Comet ISON Will Give Earth-Dwellers a Spectacular Show in 2013

Ashes to Ashes: South Korean Company Turns Loved Ones' Ashes into Beads

South Korea has a long tradition of honoring the dead, but now that space is limited for burials and many South Koreans find the tradition of storing a loved ones cremated remains in an urn distasteful, a company has come up with an interesting alternative.

The South Korean company Bonhyang is now offering grieving families the opportunity to transform the ashes of the deceased into decorative bluish beads, which can then be put in attractive containers for display. 

Over a thousand customers have already paid the equivalent of $900 for the unique service, which grinds the deceased's ashes even finer, then heats them up and shapes them into beads more suitable for public display than a boring old urn containing ashes.

Critics claim that the entire process dishonors the dead, but Bonhyang's CEO insists that the process is not disrespectful to time-honored traditions and that the beads created are a beautiful way to honor the memory of a loved one. "They're very beautiful to look at," he says. "You don't feel that these beads are creepy or scary. In fact, there's a holiness and warmth to them."

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Paranormal Stupidity IV: Man Blames Ghost for Abusing Wife

"I might not look all that scary, but I especially like to terrorize women..."
A Wisconsin man being hauled off to the pokey for domestic abuse against his wife certainly had an original excuse to tell the police: a ghost was responsible!

According to a January 18 criminal complaint filed in court 41-year-old Michael West and his spouse got into an argument on Sunday that turned violent. The victim told police that her husband twice strangled her, and that he also punched her in the face after she tried to contact 911.

When police arrived at the residence, the female victim had a bloody nose as well as facial bruising. During routine police questioning, West originally claimed his wife sustained injuries to her face and neck during several repeated falls. When pressed by the police, who pointed out scratches and marks on the woman’s neck, the drunken West quickly altered his story. “A ghost did it,” he suddenly claimed.

Needless to say, the Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, police didn't feel the need to conduct a seance to prove the man wasn't telling the truth. West was arrested  on charges of strangulation, domestic battery, drunken and disorderly conduct, as well as resisting arrest.

Gold Medal Pornstache? Swimmer Michael Phelps Sports 70s Porn Star Look

The world's most decorated athlete, swimmer Michael Phelps, has been spotted sporting a classic 70s horseshoe pornstache while training in Miami.

The 26-year-old superstar and Subway spokesperson was photographed enjoying some down time while in Florida with the new facial hair styling. He donned a pair of aviator shades and purple and black swimming trunks poolside to complete his unique look. The talented athlete is currently in training for the upcoming London 2012 Olympic Games.

It might be that Phelps is sporting the new look after a rumored break-up with longtime girlfriend  former Miss California USA Nicole Johnson, also 26. Rumors began that there was trouble in the swimming pool after the pair spent New Years Eve apart. The couple have been dating off and on for several years, but neither party has confirmed or denied a split. 
Michael Phelp's usual sexy self...

The Olympic gold medalist style icon: 70s porn star John Holmes

Friday, January 20, 2012

Still Dazed & Confused: Matthew McConaughey Reprises Stoner Role for Video

Actor Matthew McConaughey has made an unexpected return to one of his first big screen roles, the character of David Wooderson in the classic coming-of-age film Dazed & Confused. 

McConaughey puts on the tight tee and pornstache that he wore in the 1993 cult film, which also starred a young Ben Affleck, Milla Jovavich, Parker Posey, Joey Lauren Adams and Cole Hauser, in the music video for Butch Walker & The Black Widow's song "Synthesizers". The film, set in a small town in Texas during the mid-1970s, follows a group of high school students on a quest to buy beer (and other non-beer items) for a party in honor of the group becoming seniors.

McConaughey's iconic Wooderson character was considerably older than the high school kids he hung around with, and he had some of the film's more memorable moments and quotes. You can check out dead beat stoner Wooderson's resurrection in the video below:

Cyber World War III: Anonymous Attacks Federal Websites in Retaliation for Megaupload Closing

The hacker group known as Anonymous declared Cyber World War yesterday, attacking a myriad of websites in response to the closing of online file sharing website Megaupload.com in a shocking anti-piracy clamp-down, obviously in response to the public's growing concern over the Stop Online Piracy Act.

Four of Megaupload's operators were arrested yesterday and the site was promptly taken offline. Almost immediately, members of Anonymous began to openly plot an organized attack to shut down sites yesterday evening, targeting recording industry sites BMI, RIAA and Universal Music, which are all three still offline as of early this morning.

They also targeted US Department of Justice as well as the CIA and FBI sites, knocking them offline for several hours yesterday. These sites are currently back up and running.

The hacker collective announced its ominous attentions on Thursday."We Anonymous are launching our largest attack ever on government and music industry sites. Lulz," the group said in a statement posted late Thursday on an associated Twitter account. "The FBI didn't think they would get away with this did they? They should have expected us."

Many people believe the shutdown of Megaupload was the first salvo in a planned federal operation to limit Internet freedoms within the United States. Popular website Wikipedia shut-down for a 24-hour period on Wednesday to protest the Stop Online Piracy Act currently under consideration in Congress, with thousands of other sites joining the protest. The following day, a large number of Congress members decided not to support the act after the loud and angry public outcry.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Beam Me Up, Scotty: William Shatner Fired from Priceline Commercials

He had a great many memorable battles as Captain James T. Kirk on the original classic Star Trek television series, and now William Shatner is poised to face another battle: to find employment again after being sacked as the Priceline.com spokesperson.

Television ads airing Monday will show Shatner's Grand Negotiator character hopping on a bus...that promptly drives off a cliff. The former Rescue 911 host has been shilling for Priceline, an online site for people looking to bid on travel and vacation packages, for the past 14 years. It appears the dot.com is dropping Shatner and placing more focus on its fixed-priced deals, as opposed to those won by bidding.

 "I'm in grief mode," Shatner says. "It's not the first time I've had an iconic character die off." His return to a regular television series, the comedy $#*! My Dad Says, was cancelled last year after only one season.

Tiger, Tiger, Burning Bright: Firefighters Race to Save Toy Tiger Stuck on Roof

Houston area firefighters and members of the rescue squad were left red-faced after racing out on an urgent call to save a tiger stuck on a rooftop, only to find the wild animal was just an over-sized novelty toy!

The rescuers responded to dozens of calls to 911 reporting a large, wild animal that was apparently stuck on the roof of an abandoned hotel.  Firetrucks and animal control agents were dispatched to the area to see what could be done to save the animal and prevent deaths or injuries to people should the vicious animal attack.

As firetrucks arrived with sirens blaring and lights ablaze, the rescuers were baffled about the lack of movement from the animal perched atop the building. As the squad took their rescue ladders out and slowly crept in for a closer inspection of the big cat, they quickly discovered that the "wild beast" was actually an eight-foot long stuffed toy!

Seems as if someone played a little prank on the local populace. I'm sure the firefighters and animal control agents were actually relieved that they didn't have to play Ziegfried and Roy and grab a real life, cantankerous tiger by the tail.

Country Star Blake Shelton Devastated by Father's Death; Cancels Tour Dates

Country superstar Blake Shelton has been left devastated following the death of his father Dick Shelton sources reveal. The elder Shelton passed away in Oklahoma on Tuesday surrounded by family and loved ones after being in declining health for several months.

They "Honey Bee" singer thanked fans for their support on his official website: "I appreciate your understanding during this difficult time and thank you for all your prayers. Your support means the world to me. I love you guys."

Shelton has rescheduled shows in North and South Dakota as well as Montana as he takes time off to mourn his loss. The singer dedicated his win at last month's American Country Music Awards to his father, who was in the hospital suffering from pneumonia at the time.

Shelton will return to his role on ABC's hit talent competition The Voice with fellow stars Christina Aguilera, Adam Levine and Ce Lo Green following the Super Bowl on February 5. He will be singing the "America the Beautiful" with his wife, fellow country music star Miranda Lambert before the big game. Shelton is also nominated for three Grammy Awards this year.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Don't Fear the Reaper: New Facebook App Lets You Announce Your Death

Facebook has allowed billions of people to stay in contact with family and friends in ways many never thought possible. In fact, you can now even announce your own death on the social media website... from beyond the grave!

A new application now available for download called If I Die gives members a chance to write their final status update in advance. After downloading and installing the app, members then select three friends as "trustees" who will all have to verify that you've "departed to greener pastures".  Then, you will be able to record a video message or announcement that will be published to your Facebook or twitter feed, letting friends, family, acquaintances and people you've never met in person before know of your untimely fate.

The idea seems to be catching on, as more than 7000 people have downloaded the app in the first few days that it has been available. So, make sure you start checking all your Facebook friends' status updates everyday...just to make sure... As they say, there's an app for that...

A Golden Girl Turns 90: Betty White Celebrates Birthday (with Help from President Obama)

Forever young actress Betty White celebrates her 90th birthday today! The eternally popular former Golden Girls star has witnessed an incredible rise in popularity over the past few years, and she's been working harder than ever.

It's no surprise that a long list of celebrities and friends wanted to honor Betty for her landmark birthday. She was feted in Hollywood last night by stars such as Hugh Jackman, Tina Fey, William Shatner, Morgan Freeman, Chevy Chase, Carol Burnett and former co-stars Mary Tyler Moore and Ed Asner.

Even President Obama took time from his busy schedule to wish Betty a Happy Birthday: "Dear Betty, you look so fantastic and full of energy, I can't believe you're 90 years old. In fact, I don't believe it," the President reads from a birthday card to Betty. "That's why I am writing to ask if you are willing to produce a copy of your long form birth certificate," he says, poking fun at the controversy surrounding his country of birth and legitimacy to be president. He then listens to the theme song from  The Golden Girls, "Thank You for Being a Friend". 

Like President Obama, I find it hard to believe Betty is 90, and the last remaining Golden Girl. Happy Birthday, America's Favorite Senior Citizen! We love you!!!

"Passengers, Prepare for Immediate Impact! Just Joking!"

Passengers on a routine British Airways flight from Miami to London were given a jolt when a recorded announcement stating that the plane was about to crash was played over the intercom!

Passengers were startled with the incorrect message in the early morning hours, apparently after one of the crew in the plane's cabin accidentally hit the wrong button. Crew members quickly interjected that the alarm was issued by mistake, but many of the passengers were still ruffled by the terrifying announcement.

"An alarm sounded and we were told we were about to land in the sea. I thought we were going to die," explained a passenger aboard the flight. "My wife was crying and passengers were screaming."

 "When we landed they were handing out letters apologizing, but it was the worst experience of my life. I don't think BA should get away with this," said another passenger. British Airways issued a public apology to the passengers for the mistake.

This is not the first incident of such a mistaken announcement being made. Last year, a pre-recorded alarm telling passengers to prepare for an emergency water landing was made during a flight from London to Hong Kong.

The Rats of Monte Cristo: Famous Island to Be Bombed with Rat Poison

Instead of hidden treasure, adventure seekers headed toward a famously mysterious Italian island will probably find a phalanx of dead rats!

The tiny island of Monte Cristo, the inspiration for the famous, swash-buckling Alexandre Dumas novel The Count of Monte Cristo, has become infested with hundreds of thousands of rats over the centuries. The rascally rodents initially arrived to the island as stowaways on pirate ships and later on cruise ships taking adventurers to sight-see on the craggy, desolate island.

Italian authorities plan to drop more than 26 tons of poison on the 4-square-mile island in hopes of getting rid of the pests. The island receives thousands of visitors and tourists each year, many captivated by the classic Dumas novel, which has been made into countless movie and television versions over the years. Dumas set his 1844 novel on the island because of the persistent myths and legends that it contains buried treasure.

Conservationists and environmentalists, however, fear the poison may end up in the sea between Tuscany and Corsica, killing other animals and marine life.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Sorry, We're Closed: Wikipedia Set to Shut Down for 24 Hrs. to Protest SOPA

Popular online encyclopedia website Wikipedia is planning on shutting down in protest of the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA) for 24 hours on Wednesday. Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales announced on Twitter yesterday that the popular community-based online encyclopedia would shut down its English versions for a full 24 hours as a form of protest against the controversial legislation that is under consideration in Congress.

The stringent legislation would shut down literally thousands of sites and blogs (mine included), if it should be adopted and passed into law.  In an official statement, Wales said, "Today Wikipedians from around the world have spoken about their opposition to this destructive legislation. This is an extraordinary action for our community to take - and while we regret having to prevent the world from having access to Wikipedia for even a second, we simply cannot ignore the fact that SOPA and PIPA endanger free speech both in the United States and abroad, and set a frightening precedent of Internet censorship for the world."

The Washington Post reports that the black-out is expected to affect some 25 million visitors. Wikipedia is one of the Top Five most visited sites on the web, with billions of unique visitors each month. Tech companies such as Google, Facebook, Yahoo, Twitter, eBay, AOL and others have spoken out against the legislation, saying it threatens the industry's livelihood as well as personal freedom of expression. Other popular online communities such as Reddit, Boing Boing and Live Leaks  have announced plans to go dark in protest as well.

Monday, January 16, 2012

She's Lovin' It: Woman Offers Sex in Exchange for Chicken McNuggets

A Los Angeles woman must have had a hankering for some Chicken McNuggets after she was arrested for soliciting sex for the McDonald's mystery meat.

Police report that Khadijah Baseer of Los Angeles was allegedly witnessed approaching automobiles during the late night hours going through a Burbank, California, McDonald's, randomly opening doors and offering men sexual favors in exchange for the McNuggets she simply could not do without!

A man told the police Baseer approached him with the offer he simply could not accept. Staff at the restaurant called the police, who promptly arrived to arrest the woman on suspicion of prostitution. Now, I haven't eaten a Chicken McNugget since I was about ten, when I ate them with my Happy Meal. From what I remember, they are nothing to write home about, but I guess to each his or her own...

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